- “They slice us, they disintegrate us, they roast us alive, they level our greatest monuments and pinpoint our deepest fears. But they also transport us, link us, serve us, protect us and illuminate the path to fortune and glory. They are beams, the glowing lances of focused radiation that have lit up our movie screens – and our imaginations – since some unknown caveman accidentally scratched a birchbark negative and became prehistory’s first FX guy. Here at the dawn of 2005’s summer blockbuster season, it’s as good a time as any to look back and salute the Great Beams of Film!” – link
- “WHAT: An alarm clock that wakes you up with the smell and sizzle of cooking bacon. HOW: A frozen strip of bacon is placed in the Baker module the night before. … Once the alarm goes off, it sends a signal to a small speaker to generate the alarm sound. We hacked it such that the signal is re-routed by a microchip that in responds by sending a signal to a relay that throws the switch to power a halogen lamp in the ‘baker module’ that slow-cooks the bacon in about 20 minutes.” – link
- “Mr. Rau drives an Audi. Audis now come with stylish ignition keys designed to house the key inside a holder, preventing rips and wear on pocket liners. You push a button on a flat two-inch shaft and the key slides out. As he demonstrated it, Mr. Rau could see the word forming in the minds of the screeners, now three, on his case: switchblade.” – link
- “Francois and Magda Boljau were shocked to find the gravediggers holding a party in a shed at the cemetery, reports Het Nieuwsblad. Mrs Bolijau said: ‘It was happening only 15 metres from his grave. The music of ‘Sex bomb, sex bomb’ was coming very loud from the loudspeakers'” – link
- “What follows is a partial collection of the worst album covers ever conceived by mankind. Ranging from ‘horrible’ to ‘crimes against humanity’, you may have seen them before, but as with any affront to the senses, they bear repeating.” – link
- “Sprayonmud is a specially formulated spray-on product for anyone that wants to give friends, neighbours, colleagues or just anyone at all, the impression that they have been off-road or, at the very least, out in the country for the weekend.” – link
- “THE COMMONWEALTH OF PENNSYLVANIA, Department of General Services, State Surplus Property Division. You are bidding on One (1) Lot of One (1) Purple Sombrero – NTSA” – link (read the question at the bottom)
P.S. Cory go foo!